For many, Christmas and New Year includes family gatherings and special holiday parties. Many times leaders that don’t fear talking at a board meeting, presenting at a conference, or negotiating a complex merger, break out in cold sweat at the thought of facing a social gathering or starting a conversation with their family.
It’s really not too different from having good conversations at work. Here are some ideas:
- Don’t let pre-conceptions or past experience stop you from starting a conversation. People change. And so do you! Give yourself and them a chance.
- Go with a positive attitude and a smile. What you think affects what you do. Think the best and ask positive questions such as: “Tell me about the most interesting, fun, or influential person you met or worked with this past year.” Or What’s one of your favorite Christmas or New Year’s memories? Then share one of yours.
- Give people the gift of listening. Focus on the person you are talking with and ask follow up questions that show you have been listening (even if it’s the 10th time you have heard your uncle’s Josh story).
- Strengthen connections. Usually at this time of year you see people you don’t connect with every day. Ask about what they are doing. Ask them to tell you something about themselves you don’t already know, or that might surprise you, or make you laugh.
- Don’t ignore those closest to you. Many times you don’t spend as much time as those closest to you deserve. Use this opportunity to ask them about their dreams about the new year, or what would they do differently if they could do over one thing from the past year.
- Be generous and specific with your praise. Noticing and appreciating details can be a special gift. Go the extra mile to appreciate the hours the cook spent on the special food, or the extra care with the artistic wrapping of a gift, or the effort to dress special just for you.
- Speak from your heart. Don't’ be afraid to show your feelings, to share from your heart, to show vulnerability. The more authentic you are, the more others will appreciate and welcome you.
Remember. . .
Demonstrate interest in others. Keep the focus of the conversation on them. When you give people the opportunity to talk abut themselves and their interests, not only will you learn more about them, but they will consider YOU a fascinating person.
I can help you or the leaders that report to you be more effective with your communication. To find out more, simply click here.